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New Century Sauce: Gradinger

Gradinger would call it 'anti-social,' whatever that may mean." "I should imagine that it is a term which might be applied to any scheme which robs society of the ministrations of its cooks," said Sir John. "I have heard mathematicians declare that what is true of the whole is true of its parts," said the Marchesa. "I daresay it is, but I never stopped to inquire. I will amplify on my own account, and lay down that what is true of the parts must be true of the whole. I'm sure that sounds quite right. Now I, as a unit of society, am independent of cooks because I can cook myself, and if all the other units were independent, society itself would be independent ecco!" "To speak in this tone of a serious science like Euclid seems rather frivolous," said Mrs.

Gradinger. "I may observe-" but here mercifully the observation was checked by the entry of Mrs. St. Aubyn Fothergill.

IO She was a handsome woman, always dominated by an air of serious preoccupation, sumptuously, but not tastefully dressed. In the social struggle upwards, wealth was the only weapon she possessed, and wealth without dexterity has been known to fail before this. She made efforts, indeed, to imitate Mrs. Sinclair in the elegancies of ménage, and to pose as a woman of mind after the pattern of Mrs. Gradinger; but the task first named required too much tact, and the other powers of endurance which she did not possess. "You'll have some tea, Mrs. Fothergill?" said the Marchesa. "It's so good of you to have come." "No, really, I can't take any tea; in fact, I couldn't take any lunch out of vexation at having to put you off, my dear Marchesa." "Oh, these accidents will occur. We were just discussing the best way of getting round them," said the Marchesa. "Now, dear"-speaking to Mrs. Sinclair "let's have your plan. Mrs. Gradinger has fastened like a leech on the Canon and Mrs. Wilding, and won't hear a word of what you have to say." "Well, my scheme is just an amplification of your mathematical illustrations, that we should all learn to cook for ourselves. I regard it no longer as impossible, or even difficult, since you have informed us that you are a mistress of the art.

We'll start a new school of cookery, and you shall teach us all you know." "Ah, my dear Laura, you are like certain English women in the hunting field. You are inclined to rush your fences," said the Marchesa with a deprecatory gesture. "And just look at the people gathered here in this room. Wouldn't they-to continue the horsey metaphor-be rather an awkward team to drive?" "Not at all, if you had them in suitable surroundings. Now, supposing some beneficent millionaire were to lend us for a month or so a nice country house, we might instal you there as Mistress of the stewpans, and sit at your feet as disciples," said Mrs. Sinclair. "The idea seems first-rate," said Van der Roet; "and I suppose, if we are good little boys and girls, and learn our lessons properly, we may be allowed to taste some of our own dishes." "Might not that lead to a confusion between rewards and punishments?" said Sir John. "If ever it comes to that," said Miss Macdonnell with a mischievous glance out of a pair of dark, flashing Celtic eyes, "I hope that our mistress will inspect carefully all pupils' work before we are asked to eat it. I don't want to sit down to another of Mr. Van der Roet's Japanese salads made of periwinkles and wallflowers." "And we must first catch our millionaire," said the Colonel.

During these remarks Mrs. Fothergill had been standing "with parted lips and straining eyes," the eyes of one who is seeking to "cut in." Now came her chance. "What a delightful idea dear Mrs. Sinclair's is. We have been dreadfully extravagant this year over buying pictures, and have doubled our charitable subscriptions, but I believe I can still promise to act in a humble way the part of Mrs. Sinclair's millionaire. We have just finished doing up the 'Laurestinas,' a little place we bought last year, and it is quite at your service, Marchesa, as soon as you like to occupy it."

This unlooked-for proposition almost took away the Marchesa's breath. "Ah, Mrs. Fothergill," she said, "it was Mrs. Sinclair's plan, not mine.

She kindly wishes to turn me into a cook for I know not how long, just at the hottest season of the year, a fate I should hardly have chosen for myself." "My dear, it would be a new sensation, and one you would enjoy beyond everything. I am sure it is a scheme every one here will hail with acclamation," said Mrs. Sinclair. All other conversation had now ceased, and the eyes of the rest of the company were fixed on the speaker. "Ladies and gentlemen," she went on, "you have heard my suggestion, and you have heard Mrs.

Fothergill's most kind and opportune offer of her country house as the seat of our school of cookery.

Such an opportunity is one in ten thousand. Surely all of us even the Marchesa-must see that it is one not to be neglected." "I approve thoroughly," said Mrs. Gradinger ; "the acquisition of knowledge, even in so material a field as that of cookery, is always a clear gain." "It will give Gradinger a chance to put in a couple of days at Ascot," whispered Van der Roet. "Where Mrs. Gradinger leads, all must follow," said Miss Macdonnell. "Take the sense of the meeting, Mrs. Sinclair, before the Marchesa has time to enter a protest." "And is the proposed instructress to have no voice in the matter?" said the Marchesa, laughing. "None at all, except to consent," said Mrs.

Sinclair; "you are going to be absolute mistress over us for the next fortnight, so you surely might obey just this once." "You have been denouncing one of our cherished institutions, Marchesa," said Lady Considine, “so I consider you are bound to help us to replace the British cook by something better." "If Mrs. Sinclair has set her heart on this interesting experiment, you may as well consent at once, Marchesa," said the Colonel, "and teach us how to cook, and-what may be a harder task to teach us to eat what other aspirants may have cooked." - "If this scheme really comes off," said Sir John, "I would suggest that the Marchesa should always be provided with a plat of her own up her sleeve-if I may use such an expression-so that any void in the menu, caused by failure on the part of the under-skilled or over-ambitious amateur, may be filled by what will certainly be a chef-d'œuvre.” "I shall back up Mrs. Sinclair's proposition with all my power," said Mrs. Wilding. "The Canon will be in residence at Martlebridge for the next month, and I would much rather be learning cookery under the Marchesa than staying with my brother-in-law at Ealing." "You'll have to do it, Marchesa," said Van der Roet; "when a new idea catches on like this, there's no resisting it." "Well, I consent on one condition-that my rule shall be absolute," said the Marchesa, "and I begin my career as an autocrat by giving Mrs.

Fothergill a list of the educational machinery I shall want, and commanding her to have them all ready by Tuesday morning, the day on which I declare the school open."

A chorus of applause went up as soon as the Marchesa ceased speaking. "Everything shall be ready," said Mrs. Fothergill, radiant with delight that her offer had been accepted, "and I will put in a full staff of servants selected from our three other establishments." "Would it not be as well to send the cook home for a holiday?" said the Colonel. "It might be safer, and lead to less broth being spoilt." "It seems," said Sir John, "that we shall be ten in number, and I would therefore propose that, after an illustrious precedent, we limit our operations to ten days. Then if we each produce one culinary poem a day we shall, at the end of our time, have provided the world with a hundred new reasons for enjoying life-supposing, of course, that we have no failures. I propose, therefore, that our society be called the 'New Decameron.'" "Most appropriate," said Miss Macdonnell, "especially as it owes its origin to an outbreak of plague-the plague in the kitchen."